Tips For Using A Strap-on For The First Time

I still remember the first time I used a strap-on. I was excited, nervous, and full of questions. Would it feel natural? Would my partner enjoy it? Would I even know what I was doing?

If you’re here, chances are you’re wondering the same things. And trust me—you’re not alone.

The truth is, using a strapon for the first time is like learning a new dance. It’s about communication, confidence, and taking things slow. Whether you’re doing it for the first time with a partner or trying it solo to get comfortable, there are some things I wish I had known that would have made the experience way smoother and way more fun.

So, let’s dive in—step by step, no pressure, just pleasure.

Tips 1: Start with Foreplay—Take It Slow, Build the Heat

Let’s be real—lesbian sex isn’t just about penetration. Some of us take our time, spending hours kissing, teasing, and touching before even thinking about anything else. And honestly? That’s how it should be.

Before bringing a strapon dildo into play, warm up the body:

Talk about it first – If this is new for both of you, discuss what feels exciting and what might feel intimidating. The best sex starts with openness and trust.
Use your hands, mouth, and body – Touching, grinding, and oral sex before penetration will make everything feel more natural.
Bring the toy into foreplay – Before wearing the strapon kit, let your partner touch it, or feel it against their skin. This builds comfort and excitement.

Pro Tip: Some of us can reach orgasm from foreplay alone, so don’t rush. Sometimes, it’s about the tease, not the finish line.

Tips 2: Choosing the Right Strapon for Beginners

Not all strap-ons are created equal. If it’s your first time, finding the right fit makes all the difference.

There are a few things to consider when choosing the right strapon dildo and harness:
A comfortable harness – A secure fit means less adjusting, more pleasure.
A beginner-friendly dildo – Soft, body-safe silicone with the perfect size for easy penetration.
Simple & adjustable designs – Making sure you and your partner both feel comfortable and in control.

What to look for in your first strap-on:
Size: A smaller, slimmer dildo (around 5-6 inches) is ideal for first-time penetration.
Material: Dildos come in various materials, so experiment a bit to find one that feels good on you. Platinum silicone is body-safe, easy to clean, and feels smooth.
Harness Fit: Harnesses (like Crassie’s Boxer Harness) feel natural, easy to wear, and don’t require complicated straps.

Want to practice first? Try wearing the harness around the house, adjusting to how it feels on your body before using it in bed.

Tips 3: Lube Is Your Best Friend—Use More Than You Think

Even if you think you don’t need it—you do.

Water-based lube works best with most sex toys, keeping everything smooth, slick, and body-safe.
Apply generously to the dildo and your partner to reduce friction and enhance pleasure.
Reapply as needed—seriously, don’t be shy with it.

Pro Tip: If your partner is a little nervous, let them guide the toy in themselves. This puts them in control and helps them relax.

Tips 4: Find the Best Position for First-Time Strap-On Sex

Some positions feel more comfortable and intimate when trying a strapon for beginners. Here are some great ones to start with:

Spooning – Lying on your sides lets you move slowly and gently while staying super close.
Face-to-Face (Missionary) – Great for eye contact, kissing, and deep connection.
Cowgirl – Your partner controls the rhythm and depth, which is perfect for getting comfortable.

What NOT to do: Avoid doggy style right away—it requires deeper penetration and control, which may be too intense for the first time.

Tips 5: The Rhythm & The Motion—Don’t Overthink It

So, you’re strapped in, lubed up, and in position. Now what?

Slow, steady movements – Start with shallow thrusts. Let your partner adjust before going deeper.
Stay flexible – The rhythm will come naturally. Feel their movements and follow their lead.
Use your hands – Caress, hold or stimulate their clit at the same time.

Remember: You don’t have nerve endings in the dildo, so rely on visual and verbal cues from your partner to know what feels best.

Tips 6: Aftercare—What Comes Next Matters Too

Good sex doesn’t end when the action stops. It’s about how you take care of each other afterward.

Check-in with your partner – “How did that feel?” “What did you like?” “What should we try next time?”
Clean your toys – Wash the dildo with mild soap and warm water. If you’re using a fabric harness, toss it in the laundry (check the label first!).
Cuddle, laugh, and stay close – The best part of sex? The post-sex snuggles and pillow talk.

Pro Tip: A lot of lesbians enjoy mutual masturbation after strap-on sex for extra pleasure and connection.

Take Your Time & Enjoy the Journey

Trying a strap-on for the first time is about more than just the act—it’s about learning, exploring, and growing closer to your partner.

So whether you’re playing for the first time or just looking to improve the experience, remember these three things:

Go slow, communicate, and have fun.
Find the right strapon kit that feels natural and comfortable.
Use lube, explore positions, and don’t stress—pleasure is the goal!

And most importantly? There’s no “right” way to do it. It’s all about what feels good for you and your partner.

Ready to explore? Find body-safe, beginner-friendly strap-ons & harnesses at Crassie.com and start your journey to pleasure today!